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"Sleep Talk" is an exciting
way for parents to assist their children to deal with various
age-specific issues more effectively. It is a tool of parenting
to enhance the relationship between parents and a child.
"Sleep Talk" is a way to give a child information
without giving him/her fear. For the parent, it is an opportunity
to release the negativity of the day and reinforce the love
and pride the parent feels for the child.
Essentially, here is how it works:
Your child is finally asleep, after a day that has taken
its toll on him as well as you. One of those days when he
has driven you crazy, or a day you have not seen him all
day. At home, get him fed and into bed. Now, after you have
a little time for yourself, you go in to kiss him "good
night"
and here is this sleeping angel. Your
love for the child becomes much more dominant than what
has happened during the day.
Doing "Sleep Talk" helps you dump any
emotional garbage of the day. Through reaffirming your love
and pride for him, you allow him to truly hear you on the
deepest level and you clear the slate for the next day's
activities.
Read a script that is appropriate for your child at this
particular time and the results will be clear. There will
be changes in his behavior and attitude. The more often
a parent uses two minutes of "Sleep Talk" with
his child, the more solid their base of self-confidence
and trust becomes. Success builds upon success, as the bond
between them becomes even stronger.
When a script is working for your child, you may get verbal
feedback, which lets you know that he is getting the message.
For example, one day, when he was in the sixth grade, I
was driving my son, T.J. home from school. I asked him,
"How was school?"
"Fine", he said. Then, he reached over and patted
me on the knee saying, "You're proud of me aren't you,
Mom?" Now that particular phrase happens to be one
I specifically use in "Sleep Talk". His
quoting it confirmed to me that he was hearing the script
I had been using. Time and again my clients and students
have reported similar experiences.
Obviously, T.J. felt good about my pride in him and when
the time comes to make decisions about how to handle particular
situations in his life, I believe he is a ware that certain
choices might help sustain my pride, while others might
not.
I hope this will help tip the balance for T.J. to pick
more positive alternatives in life. It seems to me that
this is an appropriate role for a parent - not to force
a child to do anything, but to encourage him in certain
directions.
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